Blissed Out BabiesBlissed Out Babies
If your toddler seems full of beans just when you’re trying to wind things down for the night, you’re not alone. Manchester parents often ask: “Should I calm things right down after tea?” or “Am I over-stimulating them before bed?” And while calm is definitely the goal… sometimes the path to calm starts with a bit of chaos. Surprisingly, what your toddler might actually need to settle for sleep is connection, movement, and co-regulation, and one of the best ways to offer all three is through something called big body play, or what many of us know as roughhousing.
Big body play is energetic, physical, close-contact fun. Wrestling, chasing, rolling around on the floor, piggyback rides, tickle attacks, it’s all about shared joy and safe physical connection. But it’s not about letting kids run wild. Done well, roughhousing includes boundaries, consent, and plenty of attunement. You’re playful, but present. Engaged, but still holding the safety of the space.
You might think it sounds counterintuitive to ramp up the energy when you’re trying to wind down for bedtime. But physical play like this can be a brilliant way to help toddlers release tension, process emotions, and regulate their nervous systems. Let’s break it down.
Toddlers have busy bodies and even busier brains. They carry stress they can’t always name, from nursery transitions to big feelings they don’t yet understand. Big body play gives them a chance to let it all out through movement, laughter, and physical connection. This emotional release can prevent the bottling up that often shows up during the bedtime routine as resistance, stalling, or meltdowns.
Co-regulation is one of the biggest predictors of a child’s ability to calm down, especially at bedtime. That’s when a parent’s grounded, attuned presence helps a child shift from dysregulated to soothed. Big body play creates the perfect opportunity to practise this. The rhythm of excitement and recovery, giggling and pausing, running and resting, teaches toddlers how to go up and come back down again. With you beside them, they build trust in the process of calming down.
Let’s not forget the power of playful presence. These moments of shared joy, rolling on the floor, pretending to fall over dramatically, and making each other laugh, can be bonding gold. That deepened connection can be the very thing that helps your toddler let go at bedtime. Because they’re not being separated from you, they’re being safely held, even when you say “sleep time now.”
I have always been interested in gentle parenting techniques, and as a self confessed ‘geek’ I spent many a sleepless night reading. I became so interested in infant brain development and the science of sleep that I completed my Holistic Sleep Coaching qualification, mentored by the wonderful Lyndsey Hookway. I have been working as a toddler sleep consultant since 2018, I am based in Manchester but I can work with you from anywhere in the world online!
This coupled with my experience in settling techniques, toddler negotiation strategies and analysis of naps and sleep needs gives me a wealth of knowledge to be able help you.
If you’re looking for help with making changes to your family’s sleeping habits and would like to speak to a toddler sleep consultant who is down to earth and sympathetic and will focus on you and your family with empathy and understanding then please get in touch.
I would love to hear from you!
Jem x
You don’t need to be super sporty or silly to try this out in your Manchester home. The key is joining in with warmth and attunement. Here are a few toddler-friendly ways to ease into big body play in the hour or so before the bedtime routine begins:
It’s normal for your toddler to be a little revved up at first. That’s not a problem, it’s part of the arc. What matters is how you transition from that physical energy into your calm bedtime rhythm. Try building in a few minutes of gentle cuddles, some slower-paced toys like a jigsaw, a story, or a calming song. This creates a clear signal that the body can rest now, and the nervous system follows your lead.
The truth is: most toddlers already have a lot of energy in the evenings. If we try to clamp it down too early, it can backfire. Big body play offers a chance to let off steam with connection and joy, so your child is more relaxed, more connected, and more able to settle. And you don’t have to roughhouse every night. Even 10 minutes a few evenings a week can make a real difference.
Parenting educator Dr. Lawrence Cohen, author of Playful Parenting, has long championed roughhousing as a way to support emotional resilience and strengthen the parent-child bond. Dr. Laura Markham, a big voice in the gentle parenting world, encourages parents to use play, especially physical play, as a way to diffuse tension, reconnect after separation, and support emotional development. And researchers are increasingly linking physical connection, touch, and parent-led play to improved regulation and behaviour outcomes, especially in the toddler years.
So, the next time your toddler seems full of beans before bed, instead of heading straight for “quiet time,” try leaning into the energy. Join them on the floor. Chase them around the sofa. Let out a few belly laughs together. Because often, the fastest route to calm is through connection, and roughhousing might just be your unexpected sleep superpower for your Manchester toddler’s 10-14 hours of rest.
Click here to book a free chat with Jem to discuss sleep packages and ensure we are a good fit. There is no obligation and I will only take clients where I genuinely feel I can change their lives.
I have three simple toddler sleep support packages, Read more about them here.
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